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wedding guest list - should I invite a plus one or not?

The Wedding Guest List Guide

Photography by McGivern Photography

Narrowing down your wedding guest list can be a headache, from debates about whether to invite your parents' friends, old friends or work friends, to that dreaded 'plus one' consideration. We're chatting about all of this and more on Rock My Wedding: The Podcast, but if you want the answers right here and right now, then here are some top tips from the whole Rock My Wedding team to help you whittle down your wedding guest list.


The wedding guest list dilemma - who do you invite? Here's how you can decide who makes the cut and who doesn't!

How To Narrow Down Your Wedding Guest List

Using our fun questionnaire, as seen below, you can easily narrow down your guest list. If you haven't spoken in over a year, don't meet up with them regularly, or can't imagine them making your day more fun or memorable in any way, then we'd say you can consider them not invited. Not inviting someone to your wedding who is expecting an invite is something that comes with a lot of drama, awkwardness and tension but the truth is that it shouldn't!

It's Your Day, Your Way. You don't need to explain or give reasons why someone is or isn't invited. Whether it's budget or venue limitations or your own personal preference, you hold the power. The best way to narrow down your wedding guest list is to run each guest through the same criteria to make sure you only have people attending your day who love you and your partner and will celebrate wholeheartedly with you. Don't be afraid to stand your ground with relatives either! The only people who can have opinions on the guest list are you and your partner. 

What About Evening Guests?

If you're unsure about asking your work colleagues, inviting them to the evening reception can be a good compromise. In the same way, this is when you could invite more distant relatives, or friends from uni you haven't seen in a while that you still want to be at your day but just not for the whole thing. The question then comes, do you invite the partners? In this cost of living crisis, everyone has become a lot more understanding and accepting of not inviting partners (especially if they're someone you haven't met or they've only recently gotten together). That being said, if you're inviting your Aunt Sandra to the reception, but not her husband, Uncle John, that might be a problem. If someone is married and has been together for a long time, they come as a package deal!

Some people take an opposite stance on this. If your friend or family member is important enough to be at your wedding, then surely their partner should be there whether you've met them or not. If you haven't met your friend's partner, then what could be a better time or place to do so on your wedding day? If they are such a good friend to you to be at your wedding, it's high time you meet their partner. The more, the merrier! 

What About Plus Ones?

Plus ones can create a tricky situation. The best bet is to be quite firm (as we've mentioned above) or take an 'everyone's invited' approach! For single people with no plus ones, try to ensure they are sitting with people they know and can enjoy the day and/or evening with. This is where our ultimate guide on organising your seating chart is super helpful. That's just what we do here! 

{Pin Our Handy Guest List Guides}

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How to figure out if your guests should have a plus one or not

 

 

To have a plus one or to not have a plus one? That is the question!


As you can see, there is no right answer when it comes to selecting your wedding guest list. There are lots of differences of opinion, so that's why it's best to just go with what you and your partner feel is the right choice. It's an area of the wedding day that is truly down to you, your other half, your budget and your venue! Wondering how you can make your wedding a wonderful experience for your wedding guests? You should check out our unique wedding favour ideas. Plus, don't forget about the five signs you need for your wedding day! Nothing makes the day flow more seamlessly than clear signage! 


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